Tom Brady Pokes a Balloon, is Surprised When it Pops


Sad Tom Brady
Amidst all the Deflategate controversy, Tom Brady received a nice gift Thursday night. Several of his Patriot teammates chipped in and bought him 6,811 balloons to celebrate Brady having surpassed Peyton Manning’s record of 6,810 yards passing in the playoffs. The balloons were all (except for one) tied together in a bunch and anchored to the middle of the field in Gillette Stadium. Brady was reportedly “giddy” at the gesture according to a witness.

However, according to that same witness the situation “only got more surreal” when Brady was given the 6,811th balloon which had ‘Congratulations on the milestone!’ written on it. “Tom seemed absolutely transfixed by that balloon,” the witness confided, “He stared at it for a long time not saying anything. Then he began to poke it with his finger.”

What happened next surprised everyone present. “Tom then took a penknife from his pocket and stuck the tiny blade right into the balloon. It popped, and that surprised the heck out of him. He seemed to jump back a hundred feet. Well, he composed himself then walked back to where the ruptured balloon was now flat on the ground, and he kneeled down. I don’t know what he was thinking at that moment, but he seemed really sad.”


The preceding story is merely conjecture. Something like that
could have happened but did not.

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